journal excerpts- a piece o' me continued

07/10/08

Dear journal, 2day, kicked off quite dreary, managed to get my behind outta my bed 2 prepare Timi for sch, time ws abt 7:10 am alredi!.

After the whole jumping here and dere we got out of the house by 8:00 a.m!.. got him to sch just a lil’ bit late, and of cos Mrs Fasan won’t let me go easily, scolding, gisting and blessings kpa kpa( I luv dis woman sha)..

.. left the sch for café around 9:40 a.m, surfed for 2hrs.. mailed bossy a few lines from yesterday’s work and facebooked all the way!. Got outta the café and went to see Magic – had my first meal dere (Feso offered me rice) chilled till 2:00 pm rushed out to go get timi frm sch, butta Femi had alredi beaten me to it (lol) just wanted 2 av d feel again, its bin a while I went 2 fetch him from sch.

Before I forget I went to Funmi Odu’s school to talk to her about getting timi an afterschool teacher, which we got right dere in her school, .. Eventually a guy! He’ll resume with him on Thursday.. Teaching Math, English, Verbal and Quantitative Aptitude and Art…teaching days: Thursday, Tuesday and Friday.. God help us all, I just want the best for my Boy…

Saw Loose’s vid on music Africa 2day (it’s Okay) ws so ecstatic!...

Bossy called me in the noon, as usual giving instructions and keeping me grounded on my tasks, I like it, its working for me, my biggest heart desire right now is 2 move Loose Kaynon 2 anoda level in his career and make 101 productions one of the most talked-about Label/ outfit presently around.

Am not feeling too fly emotionally tho’ can’t seem tp put a finger on it but God dey... Tidied me up then left 4Scroll (page planning day of cos).. 5:00 - pm... after much, much by 7:06 Ed-in-chief was quite upsetting today, condemned my cover story called it rubbish & asked me not to bring such stories again, as if that was not enuff she walked away, making for the main door without saying a word about my pay, I made move by going after her 2 tell her I would be b4 she gets back and all I got was: “ehn okay” I just tried chopping it, did up my planning with Mfon who got d subtle tongue lashing 4rm me, eventually finished around 8:15.. Scurried out 2 get the MTV Base MAMA press conference thang, it ws scheduled to begin for 7:00pm, but at the time I got there (8:40pm) nufin had strtd , ran into PR & event mogul Tokunbo Modupe –@ the entrance.. see me o!.. was so Personality/fine man struck.. I got received in and later saw Bankuli, Sid… Apparently Mo’hits peeps were all in attendance, exchanged digits wit Bankuli shared few banters wit Sid then tried catching Shola Thompson to give him Loose’s DVD which I eventually did, before going back into the auditorium, O’ boy! It was a far cry from what I left behind some minutes back… showbiz/entertainment faces ; Jude Okoye, Clarence Peters, Nomoloss, Alex Okosi, Toyin Subair, Ohimai Atafo, Chigo Otefe, yeh DCC’s Chigo of cos I blanked her don’t ask me why..

Felt quite lonely but in d end spoke to a person or 2, shook my body D’banj’s tunes during his performance with d Mo’hit peeps, then said my goodbyes...Exit planet one around 10:30 pm got a cab right @ d gate, sang along wit d radio thru d ride, some tears dropping dwn my eyes... The feel and thot of being an underachiever dancing thru my mind, thots of loss, rejection sipping into my spirit, why? I just do not know, never the less, I tried to keep my mind in perspective…peace…

Got into the house arnd 11:05 pm my baby asleep, changed him into his pjyays, took my jewelries off and stared into the mirror & guess who I saw?.. dis no be hype or feel good yans!;I saw a pretty young black lady whom any good and vision oriented man shd luv & never let go off! As I pulled my wig and became bare, devoid of jewelry and my wig, I saw a rare breed and beauty… why I subject myself 2 aving relationships wit pple who don’t even value me beats me!, and 2day am saying? :I’VE HAD ENUFF!.. Dear Lord help me 2 always see this lady I found 2day, from now and thru my lifetime, show me how to have value for me, celebrate me luv me and do me better in Jesus name.. Amen the time is: 1:53 am so lets call it a day, Journal.

'08 Journal excerpts..and a piece o' me..

its being a year and two months since i posted anything on here... how i managed to do this i wonder..too!.. that's not to say the world stopped since then.. it was i who stopped on here.. but change is here now.. and that's all that matters.

i have been doing some retrospective thinking a lot since December 2010, during this period for some strange reasons i found me going through my old journals..some of the entries made me laugh, some made me cry and some made me cherish friendships and relationships i formed during the duration of those entries.. especially 'o7 and '08 as i was just getting out of the full time mummy mode..i was still staggering in a lot of aspects.. butta voila....today here i am!.. still a work under construction but now my own boss!...i have a company.. yes i do.. more to come about that in recent posts...am opening up my innermost on here some vulnerabilities and all.. to what end some might ask... that people might be inspired, learn a thing or two and maybe jus' smile...if this posts goes well according to the comments that will pour in... i jus' might do more excerpts so here y'all a piece o' me.. right here!.. relish, learn or jus' think :

22^nd of September 2008

My dearest journal, life has bin going since 15/09/08, I just dint update you…(sorry) am still praying for that equilibrium , balance et al!, had HEHF posters done, we did (walt &I ) NFVCB, I scanned for my ‘P’ and also picked Timi , and all wot nots.. its bin crazy & I don’t see it reducing any sooner, cos I got a vision am working 2wards and all these are very much part of it, am talking work, parenting God & family & friends inclusive! Nothing do us, God is my strength.

Church was great 2day, so was JUST IS GIRLS, am glad I attended the programme.. I learnt a thang or 2 from every speaker,4rm TY Bello,Tara Fela-Durotoye to Funke Buknor- Obruthe 2 Adesuwa Oyenokwe & even Pst M!.

Checked my mails, called Walt, came back home and dat’s it! Am hoping for 4 a brighter and better day 2morrow. I’ve also come to realize that we all have stories, and stories are meant to be told and if we do not tell our stories nobody will tell them and even if pple try. They can’t tell it like us!

3^rd of October 2008

Dear journal my boss left the shores of this country since the 29^th of last month, of course I’ve bin working, the responsibility is quite enormous , but I b’lieve God dint bring me to the world to be an under performer my job does not really have description attached 2 it lemme jus’ say Walter "Adawaribi" Taylaur's bizness is my business.

Loose Kaynon & HALF EMPTY HALF FULL is my major concern right now, getting Loose into the heart and homes of Nigerians first is my everyday puzzle I try to arrange, I luv my new job, I luv my boss, yes! I repeat I luv my BOSS! For different risns which we’ll get to much later, I am liking his family and am also luving Loose Kaynon our (Walt & I ) label’s baby!... the whole set up is beginning to feel like FAMILY 2 me.

Family, this word I do not joke with, I treat it with gr8 care, I nurture and cater 2 FAMILY, anybody’s pain in it is mine, I share willingly or unwillingly, am loyal 2 FAMILY.. There comes the fearful part, I find it hard separating 4rm FAMILY!.

Why i'll love something about you for all time

As far as am concerned Dr Sid has made his first evergreen record with this tune, and am sure my grand kids will still find it relevant when they get here..to me the song is not just a love song, its a piece i believe came out of the abundance of the songwriter's experience with the female folk as he traversed the globe doing what he does (tour performances i guess) and getting to a place with new lady in his life that eventually gives him the aha! which got him confessing and professing how love crazed she got him plus he din't stop there in his desperate plea to this leading lady he paints a futuristic picture of what their life together can be(the hook Don Jazzy mesmerizes with his Oliver De coqueish voice aww!) amongst other things such as

• my six yr old sings it with ease and am not uncomfortable about it
• its so clean and positive to the ear, having such a love song to sing in this era of dirty and erotic songs dripping with lewd contents/lyrics... shows that this artiste very concerned about his burgeoning fan base.
• of cos the beat wizard(Don Jazzy) killed the beat!, the Ebenezer Obey strings on the beat is so over killing..
• it appeals to even my old folks - when my mama sings it i see this light in her eyes,it gives me so much joy, cos she's always worried about how the emerging 9ja artistes are about shake ur something,hennessy,paraga and the lots seeing her appreciate this song is a very big high for me
• the hook is stupidly funny and clownish but layed with deep positive confession, afterall when we all pray about our future those things mentioned therein are paert of what we ask,infact its what every single guy or chic wants;a faithful spouse,comfort, bright and intelligent seeds,a happy household with kids that love their parents,wealth and your personal roof that shelters your family, the hook goes:
  

oya say oyoyo,mommy &daddy oyoyo
our children go say oyoyo
we go get money full the gorodom
we go start to dey live like olowo
we go buy big house for sokoto
our children no go be olodo
no cheating and no ojoro....

imagine singing that part of the song all day everyday?..not even singing it...praying it...for me they are powerful words,we were thot that we'll have what we say in Faith clinics no be so?..so tell me why i shdn't sing oya oyoyo till i get married to that faithful husby of mine,give Timi efiko siblings like he is already,while at it,still singing it till we build our beach house, have enough wealth to do God's work,bless people and live in our own little heaven we'll create with our wealth and love..ehn?.. tell me na?..lol.
NB:to listen something about you by Dr Sid click on my sound cloud link on top part of my page.

Persona o' D Week

Meet Adedoyin Kafidipe, fondly called Dido by moi,she's the first inductee into my fave person o' the week hall..she quite a discipline in Petrochemical engineering shortly after her industial attachment from NNPC 2 years ago,to follow her dream of being an extraordinary designer,a move which got her parents irate, she enrolled with the last dime she could muster in a Fashion school in Festac surburb(Foluke's alternative)to learn basic cutting and designing, so and in less than three weeks Doyin was already getting outsourced jobs and earning some change on the side,the training which was meant to take an average of six months was not a thang to her, in her 3rd month she had already started cutting patterns and her clientele was another challenge for her, notletting the money deter her Doyin's next conquest was to go aquire more skill in the UK she applied into top fashion school in the UK, armed with experience and fresh skill set, this proudly 9ja Diva is packing her bags to return home unlike the lots who'll rather stay in mama Charlies country, to take on the fashion industry and of cos her rightful place at the to at the top...

http://soundcloud.comliongurl

Our Words

In your words, you were like

Am tired
tired of lies
tired of pretences
tired of selfishness


and all relationship NO No's
I want sommin else!
sommin Inpiring..
like your hug
sommin spontaneous
like your sweetness

I swear i wanna get with you
.....can't believe am revealing my soul to you on sms!

I'd l love to see you
pls don't say the word NO.....


In my words I'd have said:
you took me by surprise

in my mind's eye
i see

i see opportunities
chances,
i see possiblities
where two hearts,minds,bodies, and souls can....

interlock,interweave,intertwine, to become...

a lone existence but.....
Inhibitions,restrictions,convictions and emotions

are building bridges

bridges we might never cross alone to meet each other
bridges we might not cross together
to be under one cover
to weather whatever

And speak of each other as....my Lover
where our cultural variations
would not have mattered.

But.... I smell rat in your voice
I see pretense in your moves
I feel deceit vibrating from your heart

My intuitions can't be wrong...
The discerning from my Spirit can't be doubted


Even the fluctuations from your eyeballs betray...You

Verity denies you...

Your emotions are...

are Phoney..



wu-nmmie

May '07

Broken

since the Doc placed you in my arms
i knew i had a spectacular man
strong lungs,bones and will
we gon' shine, ride thru the tide
my mistakes..a glorious one
no regrets about you cos
you be da best, u came with a crest
they say we go thru something to get thru something
no sleepin cos u awoken my purpose
my stumbling block now my stepin stone
my comeback's greater than my setbacks
wot mo' can i say?
tnx ma & pa for not bailing out on me
Dad wld you believe ma kid would luv Hymns like you do?
Mom, you are gold indeed,you took my shit
you deserve the crown, you are one amongst many
wot a gold money can't buy
see av better myself no nid to cry

to those kwik to judge me
if you be without no demon o' yours
cast the first stone..aha!
am only abased to admit
now am walkin the road with no regrets
but with crests only bravehearts deserve

Lagos Island Maternity
1.40 pm August 22nd 2003
after 15 hours , forty minutes of burglary proof pullin,
high toned wailing,subconcious praying,
breathing exercises and pushing
my joy bundle showed up
couldn't hold back the euphoria
tears and smiles all at once
since that day my life only got better
now my 6 yr old is a star in every word of it
Luvs music like Maamma and talks non-stop like papa.

this piece is for people like me at some point;confused,afraid and
needy-be be strong,bravehearts make sweethearts,Be u,uncompromising,dogged,rugged
and on point,remember there's always a reward for bravery..
Selah.

Wunmmie Benjamin

April '07